How to make co-parenting work after divorce
Spouses should always think of the best interests of their children when co-parenting, not their own personal feelings about their ex.
March 22, 2013
How to make co-parenting work after divorceArticle provided by Jonathan D. Katz, Attorney at Law
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Although emotions may cloud people's judgment when they go through a divorce, they must put all of that aside when making decisions for their children. And because it is imperative for children to spend time with both parents -- which can make them feel more secure as they deal with the transition of seeing their mother and father apart -- ex-spouses should always think of the best interests of their children when co-parenting, not their own personal feelings about their ex.
Tips for making a co-parenting arrangement work
Reducing conflict. Although couples may fight like cats and dogs as they dissolve their marriage, it is best for parents to maintain a united front in the care of their children and reduce conflict as much as possible. If it is difficult to be cordial with an ex, sometimes it is necessary to limit conversations to child-related matters, and avoid addressing personal issues altogether.
Sharing information. In order for both parents to make informed decisions about the care of their child, they must have information about what is going on with the child. To make a co-parenting arrangement work, parents should always let their ex know information about things related to the child's health, school, and other issues that impact the child's life. When this information is flows freely both ways, it not only helps with the parent-child relationship, it can also help ex-spouses put aside their differences and get along for their children's sake.
Keeping other family members involved. It is not uncommon for in-laws to rally around their family member during a divorce, taking sides at the expense of an ex-spouse. But that does not mean the child should lose contact with aunts, uncles or grandparents. These relationships are important for every child, as they help children develop their identities and feel like they are part of a community.
Reducing confusion. Although all parents have a unique style of parenting, there are areas where they should do their best to be as consistent as possible. When things like rules and punishments are different in the two homes, this can make it confusing for the child and can cause problems in the parent-child relationships.
Do you need help with your divorce?
Issues related to your child are too important to leave to chance. If you need legal help with an issue concerning parenting, custody or other matters, contact an experienced family law attorney to find out how you can best represent your child's needs.