Helping Children Understand Divorce
Parents must take particular care when trying to help their child understand and ultimately cope with changes in their family.
June 03, 2011
Helping Children Understand DivorceWhen a marriage ends, the breakup is generally about more than just lost love. Financial issues, fidelity, or communication breakdowns may have played a part; however, when children are part of the equation, divorce signals change, and is a complicated concept to explain and sometimes to understand for a child. As a result, parents must take particular care when trying to help their child understand and ultimately cope with changes in their family.
Divorce causes stress for children because of the various elements of uncertainty. A parent should be prepared to sit down and explain what divorce is, how it will affect the child, and ultimately, how the child's world will change. This talk, if possible, should come from both parents and be offered in a way that respects the child's level of maturity. In explaining divorce, parents must be honest and upfront about how their relationship with their child may change and how their love has not.
Some parents may find it hard to explain the concept to their child. They are not alone. When in doubt, local libraries have excellent children's books which can be read to a child and used to help compare and explain the concept and possible consequences of divorce. Other resources can include activities, counseling and board games. Each of these methods will help alleviate some of your child's fears about the process.
With the American divorce rate being so high and blended families being more common, a child is more likely to know other children with divorced parents. Divorcing couples should consider speaking with other parents about methods used to explain how parents' relationships end and what that entails.
While Hollywood may have offered us funny and sometimes touching movies that highlight a child's angst about divorce, the reality is that honest and thoughtful parenting should win out. Living through example and positive co-parenting are the best methods. Making sure that children are not exposed to confusing situations which give them false hope of parental reconciliation or arguments is key. Ensuring that words and actions are consistent is another important step.
Parents should be mindful that they are not alone when dealing with the emotional aspects of divorce. While common, each case is unique. If parents are considering divorce, they should contact an experienced attorney for guidance.
Article provided by Clark Family Law, P.C.
Visit us at http://www.clarkfamilylawpc.com