The Pros and Cons of Virtual Visitation

June 28, 2012

Having to spend time away from your kids is one of the most gut-wrenching consequences of divorce. Nothing can replace face-to-face time between you and your child, but modern electronic communication methods may at least be a supplement that helps make up for those missed times when you can't be physically together.

Electronic devices that may allow parent-child contact when they are physically apart include (with more probably on the horizon):
- Webcams like Skype allow people to converse while viewing each other live on computer screens.
- The Internet facilitates typed conversations via e-mail, instant messaging and social-media such as Facebook.
- Smartphones like iPhones or Androids can not only be used to talk like on traditional telephones, or to text message, but also can provide Internet access to facilitate any type of communication that can be done online, (although the viewing screens are much smaller than those of computers).

The possibilities for communication via virtual visitation in divorced or otherwise separated families are endless:
- An absent parent could join a conversation with his or her child and ex-spouse about a disciplinary or other important matter, allowing actual participation in an important decision.
- A grandparent could have a regularly scheduled "visit" with his or her grandchild.
- Some virtual contact may be appropriate with an absent parent who is incarcerated, hospitalized or otherwise institutionalized.
- With input from appropriate mental-health and legal professionals, and protective boundaries, electronic communication with a parent with a history of domestic violence or other crimes may be determined to be in a child's best interest.
- A child could have regular "contact" with an absent parent who is too far away to visit physically, whether that parent lives in another city, state or country, or travels for professional reasons, for example.

Only a handful of states have actual legislation about virtual visitation, but in a state with no statute, judges may have dealt with the issue in case law. It is also conceivable that the divorcing spouses could agree to virtual visitation in a settlement agreement. Whether the judge approving that agreement would allow it as part of the divorce decree may be a legal issue unique to the particular state.

Those suspicious of virtual visitation have concerns that it will be seen as a valid replacement for face-to-face time together between parents and children. Even those who support virtual visitation usually do not see it that way; rather, advocates promote it as a supplement to actual time together. In that same vein, concerns have been raised about using virtual visitation as a way to justify parental relocation far away from their children.

While a continuing parental relationship is important at any age, the youngest children probably suffer most when deprived of physical contact. The need of an infant for physical affection to bond with both parents is different and more crucial than a teenager's physical need for parental contact. Even so, even a teenager relaxing in front of the television on the couch with his or her parent physically present is probably better for bonding than chatting on a computer screen.

Many families can afford the equipment needed to facilitate electronic contact and increasingly libraries with public Internet access may provide other families with the possibility of virtual visitation, although there may be privacy concerns in a public place. With the U.S. divorce rate around 50 percent, millions of children could potentially benefit from a virtual-visitation arrangement. Talk to an experienced divorce attorney about the evolving law affecting virtual visitation in your state.

Article provided by Bishop Law Office
Visit us at www.bishoplawoffice.com