Can I Date or Cohabit During Divorce?

Dating or cohabitating could cause you problems while your divorce or child custody matter is pending, so be careful and discrete.

2013-04-05

April 05, 2013 (Press-News.org) Should you date or live with someone while your divorce is underway? Like so many things, it depends on many factors. Do you have children? Do you and your spouse have the same level of acceptance about the breakup of your marriage? Has one of you accused the other of "cheating?" Is one of you financially dependent on the other?

The answers to questions like these and more should inform your decision about immediately moving in with someone else while you are still technically married. Experts have different opinions, but all agree: Proceed cautiously and be aware of appearances.

Things to consider before dating or cohabiting:
- Technically, adultery is illegal in Massachusetts. If you live with another person before your marriage ends, you are committing adultery. Courts generally don't care about this, but your soon-to-be ex might want to make an issue of it. And many judges just don't like it. Why antagonize them unnecessarily?
- Depending on the nature of your live-in relationship, your spouse may claim that you are not acting in the best interests of the child or children. It might be possible to demonstrate that you are associating with inappropriate people and exposing the child to bad behavior.
- If you spent lots of money on your new partner before the marital property was divided according to law, you might have to give it back. During property division, the court takes into account conduct during the marriage, so cohabiting could affect how the court divides the marital estate if you and your ex cannot agree.
- If you are out with your new partner instead of watching your children, that could certainly be used as ammunition against you in a child custody dispute.
- Will living with or dating someone else enrage your spouse to the point that your divorce proceedings are more contentious than they would be otherwise? Will it increase the level and intensity of discovery - credit cards, phone bills, restaurant receipts?
- Consider the effect on your children if you move in with someone else. If they are young, they could be very confused about the roles of the adults in their lives. Do not tell them that your live-in is their new mommy or daddy.
- If you are cohabiting, a judge will see this as a source of additional income - after all, you are presumably sharing costs with your new partner. The result could be a larger spousal support award to your ex.

The bottom line among experts is that cohabiting with another partner before or during divorce is not advisable. Some even suggest that you not date while your divorce is pending. If you do, be discreet, be ultra-sensitive to your children and to your work responsibilities. Otherwise, your divorce could be unnecessarily stressful.

Article provided by Massachusetts Family Law Group
Visit us at www.thebostondivorcelawyer.com

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Can I Date or Cohabit During Divorce?

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